smoke

today, i need to learn to breathe. or else, i'll end up in a mental hospital or a cemetery very soon. i am shaking and boiling and smoke is coming out of my nose and my ears because i'm so stressed out and angry and annoyed and not ready for AILA and mad at the whole world! not good.

resent duqu and wmich irb protocols, asked columbia's director to take an irb training thingy. have lost track of how many irb offices have never received my files, lost them, forwarded the files to someone who never received them, were taken care of by people who went on vacation without saying anything, got lost between offices, disappeared into the vast internet void, and god, had i known, i would have tracked down those people from the beginning! like wmich, i sent the stuff at the beginning of june!!!! it was received, forwarded to someone who took a leave of absence for two months and never did anything with it! so now i call and no one has ever seen the file... the first guy is on vacation, no one knows nada, and i have to redo it all! DAMMIT! iu's person is gone for the week... it's been 4 weeks now, and the poor director writes me desperate emails saying HAVE YOU GOTTEN PERMISSION YET???? every other day...

i need to breathe...